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A man who not only respects that but enjoys it is a man who will not lack for online sexual partners.
And if you're not willing to make the investment, go to a cam-girl site and pay to play instead.
Because I've been an observer but not sexually active online for the past few years, I called up Kirk (not his real name), an administrator in an adults-only webcam community.
We had a private webcam conversation that confirmed what I already knew: Nothing but the tech has changed since my days as Aphrodite.
What people don't realize is that it's hard to find good sex online if you're a woman, and hard to find sex at all if you're a man.
You can't just log into a webcam community and get laid, any more than you can join an online role-playing game and hook up without making any further effort.
It kills the mood if you toss too many endearments around in public, and mood is very important in adult chat.
In fact, mood is as contagious online as it is offline."There's a momentum that happens," he says.
He advises newbies to introduce themselves, to jump into the chat and start talking.
"Often the conversation in the room is pretty superficial, but talking behind the scenes in IM can get more substantive."He does admit to the occasional "wank session," though.
Women have told him that they prefer to see faces to cocks, so he keeps his camera pointing higher, à la Beautiful Agony.
"When someone gets to know you, they might add you to their (friend) list," he says. I know people who do that all the time, but they don't do it with complete strangers."Kirk has been a member for almost four years, and rarely has cybersex anymore.
The draw now is the community itself, the relationships he has formed over time."I like coming home and chatting with people," he says.
Please allow a few moments for the online connection to be established and review the rules at the bottom of this page before you enter the room.