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You have an amazing opportunity to teach your kids—in what you say and in how you behave—how to love and be loved.Start these lessons when your kids are young and continue them even as your kids become adults.We know that teens are anxious about developing romantic relationships and they feel unprepared.In fact, data from a study at Harvard of over 3,000 young adults 18-25 indicated that 70% want to talk with parents about love and 65% wish they had learned about love in school. Kids deserve to carry a sense of optimism and hope about their potential to create happy and healthy romantic relationships, so if what you want to tell your kids is something cynical (love is lie, women aren’t to be trusted, or there are no good men left), use that as an indicator that you would benefit from some support for yourself (like therapy or a support group or a self-help book about healing from heartbreak).One way of doing that is by modeling that human bodies are amazing! I wonder who taught you expressions like "damaged goods" and "inept and incompetent in romantic relationships" when you speak about yoursef... Tell your child he/she will create his/her own future. You can live as love in your relationship with your child and that is separate and apart from the choices you make with respect to your own love life.
They can't really understand what you're saying, after all, so why do it, right?
They may not understand exactly what you're saying (although there are some dogs that have been shown to know over 1,000 words), but they can guess your emotion within your tone of voice, which is important when they're working to understand what you want or need from them, even if all you want is a snuggle.
Even though the instinct to talk to pets is pretty natural for all humans, there are, apparently, some people who are more likely to talk to their pets than others.
As you recover and become aware of your resilience and strength, you can talk with your kids about how, yes, you got hurt by love, but here’s what you learned and here’s how you make healthier choices for yourself today. Tips for talking with your kids about romantic relationships Creating a culture of respect As parents, we are well-positioned to model respect in our interactions with our kids so that they can make sexual and relational choices that are respectful of themselves and of their partners. Beyond standard school material, pretty much any advice I might give the child in these topics is likely to be useless at best and damaging at worst. Just treat your child kindly and with love, as you probably already do, because otherwise you would not have written "I do not want my situation to damage the child's psychology." So stay thoughtful towards your child and be open and honest to tell your child how you feel. Kids are little social scientists who pick up all kinds of lessons about love while spending time in our homes.
Our kids absorb tons of messages about respect just from watching how we interact with the world. Can I do any better than keeping quiet beyond the clinical basics? Tell him/her it does not mean he/she will have a difficult feeling about possible future relationship with someone significant. Maybe there are better ways and words to describe that you prefer not to be in a relationship. Do not use damaging descriptions when you speak about yourself. They learn from what we say AND from how we behave.
One of the most important, and often omitted, sex and relationship education lessons is about consent. Making Caring Common Project, Harvard Graduate School of Education. Those are the qualities we need as the foundation of ALL of our relationships. Curious, open-ended conversations about life that leave plenty of room for mystery and wonder, and LOTS of listening are invaluable for our kids!